Yesterday was a better day. I took the day off and spent a bit of time wrapping my head around my goals and challenges. I didn't do so well with eating healthy, but I drank less and I took care of a few things I haven't had time to take care of, e.g. eyeglasses, house stuff, etc.
What is difficult for me to reconcile is that there are people struggling in the world to simply get enough to eat in one day and here I am struggling NOT to put too much in my mouth. It's a moral issue on some levels. Not just an emotional habit. Need to think about this some more.
I reconnected with a friend as well. It was good. We have much in common and enjoy each other's company. What a gift!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Day 1 - No Will Power
So, I can barely squeeze into some of my clothes. Can't fit into most. And most of them are new, so I'm not gonna go out and buy more stuff. Either I must lose weight or I'm just going to have to walk around naked which would be really humiliating given how I feel about myself these days.
Why don't I have any will power? What is standing in my way?
Well, first off, what is my motivation?
1. I recently learned that a dear friend of mine nearly died of blockages in his arteries - 90% in two of them to be exact. He's only in his early 50s. My age. Jeez.
2. My son is getting married next September and I want to look awesome.
3. We are getting a family photo taken in 7 weeks and I want to look less like someone just inflated me like a balloon and more like a normal person.
4. I want to be healthy and my healthy weight is around 175 for my height (5'9"). I'm at 185 right now as of today.
5. My husband and I are traveling to Borneo next spring and I want to make it to the Pinnacles and the top of Mt. Kinabalu without dying. Small thing.
6. I want confidence. I work with people all day every day and I want to feel confident in how I look.
7. I don't like to put a ton of thought into what I wear each day. These days, I change clothes a minimum of twice each morning until I feel as though I'm not entirely grotesque. An exaggeration, but you get the point.
So with all the motivating factors, what is with me? Yeah, I'm busy, I'm rushed, I'm exhausted. In my head I know that exercise and a good diet will only energize me, but the getting-going is like a big insurmountable wall. Am I that much of a wimp? Can I not give up wine for one day (loads of empty calories in wine)??
I've started this blog to motivate myself. I will do my best (I say that now) to maintain the blog and to be truthful. I plan to use the Weight Watchers plan and to join the local wellness center - oh, and to actually utilize the faciltiies. Each day, I will report back on my progress. One step at a time.
Oy!
Why don't I have any will power? What is standing in my way?
Well, first off, what is my motivation?
1. I recently learned that a dear friend of mine nearly died of blockages in his arteries - 90% in two of them to be exact. He's only in his early 50s. My age. Jeez.
2. My son is getting married next September and I want to look awesome.
3. We are getting a family photo taken in 7 weeks and I want to look less like someone just inflated me like a balloon and more like a normal person.
4. I want to be healthy and my healthy weight is around 175 for my height (5'9"). I'm at 185 right now as of today.
5. My husband and I are traveling to Borneo next spring and I want to make it to the Pinnacles and the top of Mt. Kinabalu without dying. Small thing.
6. I want confidence. I work with people all day every day and I want to feel confident in how I look.
7. I don't like to put a ton of thought into what I wear each day. These days, I change clothes a minimum of twice each morning until I feel as though I'm not entirely grotesque. An exaggeration, but you get the point.
So with all the motivating factors, what is with me? Yeah, I'm busy, I'm rushed, I'm exhausted. In my head I know that exercise and a good diet will only energize me, but the getting-going is like a big insurmountable wall. Am I that much of a wimp? Can I not give up wine for one day (loads of empty calories in wine)??
I've started this blog to motivate myself. I will do my best (I say that now) to maintain the blog and to be truthful. I plan to use the Weight Watchers plan and to join the local wellness center - oh, and to actually utilize the faciltiies. Each day, I will report back on my progress. One step at a time.
Oy!
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